By misfortune of being born just seven years too late, I missed my chance to vote for a political party co-led by a cat. Catmando, a magnificent white and ginger fluffball, served as joint leader of the Official Monster Raving Loony Party (OMRLP) from 1999 to 2002 – a role he shared with his owner, Alan “Howling Laud” Hope. The OMRLP stood 15 candidates in the 2001 general election, its fifth since Screaming Lord Sutch launched the nascent party in 1983, and received 6,655 votes. Fittingly, given its semi-whiskered leadership, its manifesto that year included a “Ministry for Pets” section, which proposed: “All animals will have the same rights to cross the roads as zebras, pelicans and puffins. Electronic pets will be allowed a proxy vote by email. All dogs will be fitted with nappies to stop them pooing all over parks.”
In comparison, Count Binface’s perennial promises to build at least one affordable home, cut the price of 99 Flake ice creams to 99p and force cyclists who break the Highway Code to ride unicycles instead seem almost sensible. Having stood against Andy Burnham, Rishi Sunak, Sadiq Khan, Boris Johnson and (in his former guise of Lord Buckethead) Theresa May, the “independent space warrior” is gearing up to take on Nigel Farage in the Clacton by-election on 13 August.
While all the mainstream parties quickly decided to sit this one out and deny Farage his attempted “people versus establishment” stunt, 32 other candidates are standing, including no less than three from the OMRLP. One is Howling Laud Hope (who took over full leadership of the party after Catmando sadly died in 2002). The others have listed their names as Nick the Incredible Flying Brick and Baron Von Thunderclap.
It is easy to laugh at all this. Indeed, laughing is part of the point. As his de-binned alter ego (real name Jon Harvey), the count is a comedy writer. Other comedic novelty candidates include Al Murray, who stood in his proud Pub Landlord persona in South Thanet when Farage was hoping to win a seat there in 2015, and the YouTube prankster Niko Omilana, who sparked controversy in 2024 when he appeared to be registered in 11 different constituencies. (Omilana claimed he had convinced other people to change their names to his to pull off this trick, since standing for more than one seat is prohibited.) And lest anyone misunderstand the OMRLP’s ethos, its slogan is, “Vote for insanity: you know it makes sense.”
As Al Capone says in The Untouchables, “We laugh because it’s funny and we laugh because it’s true.” There has always been truth intertwined with satire when it comes to novelty candidates. When Screaming Lord Sutch first faced voters, it was for the “National Teenage Party” in the 1963 Stratford by-election, triggered by the resignation of John Profumo. His point was a semi-serious one, highlighting the hypocrisy that the voting age was then 21, when older adults like Profumo behaved so abysmally. The voting age was lowered to 18 six years later. The OMRLP proved prescient on other issues that are now law, such as 24-hour pub licensing, passports for pets, the abolition of the eleven-plus exam and the pedestrianisation of Carnaby Street in London. What seems insane one day is politics as usual the next – a point the revolving cast of Downing Street might want to keep in mind.
When Westminster’s most noteworthy are forced to share a stage on election night with candidates dressed as bins or pirates or Sesame Street characters, it offers a sort of memento mori: yes, you might brush shoulders with royalty and be driven around in an armoured car surrounded by bodyguards, but beneath it all you’re nothing special. Now shake hands with this cartoon fox.
Back in Clacton, Count Binface is using his platform to keep Farage’s £5m crypto donation in the spotlight – a cause one could easily imagine winning the approval of Screaming Lord Sutch. The same goes for my own cat’s bid to follow in Catmando’s paw-steps and enter politics. I think she’d be an excellent foreign secretary.
[Further reading: Even the Royal Navy can’t save Nigel Farage]